Welcome to our Mistress of London BDSM world, we understand that sometimes you might feel quite apprehensive with the BDSM scene, therefore we thought that could be useful to provide you with a section to share orientation and guidance for everyone interested in BDSM or Domination World. Here you will find an explanation for most of the terms used in the Fetish / Domination scene. Our objective is to build an extensive catalogue to let people know about this amazing world:
Mistress or Dominatrix: is a woman who takes the dominant role in bondage, discipline (in the sexual-fetish sense of the word) and sadomasochism, or BDSM. A common form of address for a submissive to a mistress is "domina" or "maîtresse". Note that a dominatrix does not necessarily dominate a male partner; a dominatrix may well have female submissives, nor must the role of a dominatrix involve physical pain toward the submissive; her domination can be verbal, involving humiliating tasks and servitude.
BDSM (bondage/discipline, Dominance/submission, sadism/masochism): is a variety of erotic practices involving dominance and submission, role-playing, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who don't consider themselves as practicing BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community and/or subculture is usually dependent on self-identification and shared experience. Interest in BDSM can range from one-time experimentation to a lifestyle.
BDSM Dictionary:
A - B - C - E - F - H - J - M - N - P - S - T
Adult Babies: Adult babies roleplaying as a baby or small child for erotic stimulation is considered the signature expression of paraphilic infantilism. This may involve the use of adult-sized diapers and baby clothes or toys and furniture such as a crib to lend reality to the infantilist fantasy, crawling on the floor, and some individuals may urinate or defecate in their diapers. If a partner is willing, adult babies may engage in parent-baby roleplay including being bathed, powdered and changed into diapers by one's partner, before being put to bed with a baby bottle. Thereafter the adult baby may be comforted and pampered by their Mistress in the role of the parent and their diapers might be changed if wet or dirty. For some infantilists, the ritual might instead involve being scolded, spanked or chastised for having wet or dirtied their diapers. In this latter instance the mode of arousal is masochistic. Others may only desire gentle or nurturing treatment, based on the desire to be cared for or to "surrender the responsibilities of adult life". Some infantilists may involve masturbation and ejaculation while others may choose not to engage in sex since it is not babylike. The erotic pleasure derived from either of these forms of infantilism may replace the need for sexual intercourse in reaching orgasm.
Age Play: Ageplay can enhance power dynamics. Oftentimes, sissification of slaves is present, in order to add another level of power to the situation.
Sexual variations may include among other things such as incest play, in which individuals recreate and sexualize roles within a family, and Daddy's girl fetishism in which real or imagined age differences are the basis of the roleplaying and the female is portrayed as the younger partner.
Anal Play: is not necessarily dirty (Provided an enema has been done prior to the session), messy, smelly or inherently homosexual, unless you want it to be! Like any other form of sexual or BDSM play, anal can be erotic, painful, stimulating, humiliating, or joyous depending on your desires and intentions.
For many subs, females too but perhaps especially males, being penetrated anally is the ultimate form of domination and accepting it the ultimate demonstration of their submission. Most people are brought up to see the anus as dirty and anything to do with it as unmentionable. It possibly holds a special fascination for that reason. For men to accept penetration they must overcome all their fears and misconceptions of what that means to them. No, anal play is not unique to BDSM but it has some deep rooted associations that make it a special and often most rewarding part of Scene activities, for both people involved. Arse play has its pleasures, forms and dangers too. Enough so that it definitely deserves this section of its own.
Ball Busting: is a form of CBT in which a man has his testicles kicked, kneed, punched or squeezed.
Bastinado: the act of striking or whipping of the feet with a rod, cane, or similar object.
Body Worship: is any practice of physically reverencing a part of Mistress' body, and is usually done as a submissive act in the context of BDSM. Typical kinds of body worship include worship the buttocks, feet or legs. Body worship is popular among people of all sexual orientations and gender identities.
Usually accompanied by prostration, re-enforcing a sense of inferiority, a "sub" generally licks, kisses and sucks their dominant's body part, and is not allowed to touch it in a more conventional way. The aspect of erotic humiliation is perhaps appreciated by bearing in mind the commonplace phrase "kiss my ass."
Worshiping a body can also be done because the worshiper is in awe of the body part and wishes to praise that beauty. Although encouragement may be provided, verbally or by spanking, body worship is typically received more or less passively, the worshiped party aloof. Facesitting and smothering are forms of body worship which differ chiefly because of their aggressive approach.
Bondage: is the tying, binding, or restraining of a slave for the sexual, aesthetic, and/or psychological pleasure. Rope, cuffs, bondage tape, self-adhesive bandages, or other restraints may be used for this purpose. Because it is a common misconception, it is important to note that bondage itself does not contain sadomasochism.
Bondage may be used as an end into itself, as in the case of rope bondage and breast bondage. It may also be used as a part of sex or in conjunction with other BDSM activities. The letter "B" in the acronym "BDSM" comes from the word "bondage". Sexuality and erotica are an important aspect in bondage, but are often not the end in itself. Aesthetics also plays an important role in bondage.
The most common reason for the active partner to tie up his/her partner is pleasure from the restrained partner's submission and the feeling of the temporary transfer of control and power. For sadomasochistic people, bondage is often used as a means to an end, where the restrained partner is more accessible to other sadomasochistic behaviour. However, bondage can also be used for its own sake.
Boot Fetish: is a term for the practice of extreme adulation of boots in BDSM, usually carried out while the footwear is being worn by the Mistress. It is related to foot worship in a derivative way, in that the adulation may really be attributable to the proximity of the boots to their mistress. The foot is usually considered one of the "lowest" and least appreciated parts of the body, and it is a kind of humiliation to be kissing and licking someone's foot.
In Boot worship, the humiliation goes one step further. The slave willingly worships the Mistress' shoes, and often without even being asked to. This reverence for the footwear that encloses the Mistress' foot is sometimes an expression of extreme devotion or loyalty, sometimes a concrete admission of inferiority or defeat, and sometimes both.
Thus boot worship may include sniffing or inhaling from worn boots, as well as licking, kissing or cleaning their exteriors by licking. Sometimes polishing of the boot can also be done. Chewing and eating of leather shoes can also be done.
Breath Control: an activity in which the Mistress controls a slave breathing. This can be done with the use of tubes, airtight masks, strangulation, drowning, or various other techniques.
Butt plug: is a sex toy designed to be inserted in the anus and rectum for sexual pleasure. In some ways, they are similar to a dildo, but they tend to be shorter, and must have a flanged end to prevent the device from being lost inside the rectum.
CBT (Cock and Ball Torture): is a sexual activity involving torture of the slave genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation or even kicking.
The slave may receive direct physical pleasure via masochism, or emotional pleasure through knowledge that the play is pleasing to a sadistic.
Electrics: is a practice that involves the application of electrical stimulation to the nerves of the body, with particular emphasis on the genitals, using a power source (such as a TENS, EMS, Violet wand, or made-for-play units) for purposes of sexual stimulation.
Face Sitting: is a practice in which a Mistress sits on or over the salve's face. It is common for this position to form part of BDSM, involving dominance and submission. Within a BDSM context, facesitting can be an especially intense form of erotic humiliation.
Fire Play: is a form of temperature play that involves using flame on or very close to, the skin. The flame is typically on or applied with a fire wand (essentially a small torch). Other common fire play toys include flaming gloves and flaming floggers.
Foot Worship: is a pronounced sexual interest in feet. It is the most common form of sexual fetishism for otherwise non-sexual objects or body parts.
Forced Feminization: is used to describe the practice, especially in female dominance, of switching the gender role of a male submissive. It is usually achieved via cross-dressing, where the male is dressed in female attire, ranging from just wearing female undergarments to being fully dressed in very feminine attire, including make-up, hairdress and nail polish. Some slaves take on tasks, behaviours and roles that are overtly feminine, and adopt female mannerisms and postures in task such as sitting, walking and acting in a feminine manner. This emasculation may be coupled with punishments such as spanking or caning to gain cooperation and heighten submission of submissive male. Begging and pleading to stop the feminization may be part of the fantasy.
Costumes are sometimes very domestic, suggestive of servitude or ageplay. The clothes may be from those of a traditional submissive female role, such as schoolgirl, secretary or a "sissy" maid, to a princess.
Forced feminization may also include the slave receiving anal sex from a female using a strap-on dildo (sometimes called pegging), or penetration from another male, or group of males, using their penis. Butt plugs and other anal penetrative toys may also be used. Anal sex is used because it may be perceived to be feminine due to its traditional use on women in heterosexual relationships, or due to the passive/receiving/submissive being penetrated, whereas the typical male role may be judged to be more active/dominant. Alternatively, the feminized male may be "forced" to perform oral sex on the penis of another male and/or receive blows from the other man's penis.
Hot Wax Play: is a form of sensual play involving warm or hot wax usually dripped from candles or ladled onto a salve's naked skin. Wax play may be combined with other BDSM or sexual activity.
Humiliation: is the consensual use of psychological humiliation in a domination context. Whereby a slave gains arousal or erotic excitement from the powerful emotions of being humiliated and demeaned; it is often, but not always, accompanied by sexual stimulation. The humiliation need not be sexual in nature; as with many other sexual activities, it is the feelings derived from it that are sought, regardless of the nature of the actual activity. It can be verbal or physical, or in private or public. Often it can become ritualized, and unlike some sexual variations it can also be easily carried out over a long distance.
Japanese Rope Bondage: involves tying up the bottom using simple yet visually intricate patterns, usually with several pieces of thin rope (often jute, hemp or linen and generally around 6 mm in diameter, but sometimes as small as 4mm, and between 7m-8m long). In Japanese, this natural-fibre rope is known as 'asanawa'; the Japanese vocabulary does not make a distinction between hemp and jute. The allusion is to the use of hemp rope for restraining slaves, as a symbol of power, in the same way that stocks or manacles are used.
Mummification: as a BDSM sexual bondage practice involves restraining a slave's body in a non-damaging way by wrapping it head to toe, or neck to toe, in materials like saran wrap/clingfilm, cloth, bandages, rubber strips, duct tape, plaster bandages, bodybags, or straitjackets. The end result is a person completely immobilized and looking like an Egyptian mummy. They may then either be left bound in a state of effective sensory deprivation for a period of time, or sensually stimulated in their state of bondage, before being released from their wrappings.
Mummification is often used to enhance a feeling of total bodily helplessness, and incorporated with sensation play.
Needle Play: is body piercing done for the purpose of enjoying the experience rather than producing a permanent body decoration. Needles, sharpened bones, or other tools used in play piercing are removed from the body when the episode is complete, allowing the wounds to heal. Those who engage in play piercing may do so for the purpose of spiritual self-discovery, for sexual pleasure or raising awareness.
Play piercing as part of a BDSM scene can produce an intense natural endorphin high which can last for hours and can induce orgasm in many of the people who experience it. The experience of multiple piercings in an erotically or spiritually charged context is qualitatively very different from the experience most people have had with phlebotomists in medical settings, in part because the needle is placed 'through' the skin at a secant so that both ends are accessible, rather than 'into' the skin.
Nipple Torture: the stimulation of the nipples in a painfully erotic way with clamps, teeth, whips, needles, or other devices.
Over the Knee Spanking: a position involving the placement of the submissive over the knee of the Mistress for the administering of a spanking. This technique is highly erotic and can easily result in sexual arousal.
Puppy Play: When a person acts out canine mannerisms and behaviours, it is sometimes associated with leather culture. The dominant role is taken by the Mistress. The submissive is considered a "pup" or a "dog". Puppy play is often about being playful, mischievous, and instinctive. In relation to other BDSM play, a "puppy" who is "unowned" or "uncollared" can be referred to as a "stray". Other elements rooted in BDSM play involve bondage and restriction with collars, leashes, cages, and hoods, the submissive's hands are often covered in mitts, both sexual and non-sexual services are requested, and "training" may take place in order to teach commands. The submissive may be asked to bark, kiss/lick the Mistress' foot/shoe, and eat like a dog.
Sensory Deprivation: a scene in which the Mistress takes away the senses of a slave with the use of gloves, blindfolds, bondage, earplugs, etc., in an erotic manner.
Spanking: is the act of spanking a person for the sexual arousal or gratification. Activities range from a spontaneous smack on bare buttocks, to occasional roleplay (such as ageplay) to domestic discipline and may involve the use of a hand or the use of a variety of spanking implements, such as a spanking paddle or cane. Erotic spanking may be administered to bare buttocks or normally dressed. Spanking can involve the use of bondage in order to heighten sexual arousal and feelings of helplessness.
Tie and Tease: To be able to control an orgasm of a slave, physical restraints are commonly used. Situations involving bondage are typically called tie and tease and can be thought of as extended tease and denial games. This practice is often an integral part of erotic denial. It is notable that in discussions between BDSM partners, negotiation usually focuses on the activities which may or may not be agreed to, rather than the emotions generated by said activities (unless at an unacceptable level). Tie and tease activities are physically as well as psychologically intense, because the strong feelings of sexual frustration are escalated by the sensation of helplessness induced by bondage.
Please remember that this is NOT a guide and all definitions posted here were taken from external sources and do not represent our point of view.
